I know what you're doing,
I'm no fool to what I see.
I know the games you're playing,
But you're not playing them with me.
My eyes are wide open,
Now I'm one step ahead.
You can't keep up with me,
So you lie to me instead.

I'll just sit back and watch,
As karma takes ahold.
You're destiny's written,
By a loveless hand so cold.
You must think that I'm dumb,
Just 'cos I'm keeping quiet.
I'm just biding my time,
Before I start my riot.

I gave you all my time,
And you told me that you care.
If I needed someone,
You told me you would be there.
So go ahead and run,
Take back all the words you said.
I'm building myself up,
You're no longer in my head.

You've lied for far too long,
Now you don't know who you are.
No one's gonna care now,
They can see that you're no star.
And soon the time will come,
When I stop keeping quiet.
I'll make it headline news,
So stop the press - this is.....


(C) Susannah Ford-Crush 2007

by a friend of mine on face book named susannah itz amazin .. clickz wid me heheh i m gonna start my riot tooo

MuKhtalif JalvE

Woh bhi kya log thai
asaan thi raahein
Jin ki bandh aankhein kiye
ek simat si chale jaati thi
aqal o dil - khwaab o haqeeqat
ki na uljhan na khalish
mukhtalif jalve nigaahoon ko na bahlaati thi
ishq sadaa bhi
tha bekhud bhi
tha junoon peshaa bhi
husn ko apni adaaoo pe hijaab aata tha
phool khilte Thai ToH PhOOlo MaI Nasha hota tha
RaaT DHALtI toh sheeshoon pe shabaab aata tha
Chandni Kaif-aSar rUUH aafza hoti thi
Aber aata tha toh badh-mast bhi hoo jaate thai
Din mai shorish bhi hua karti thi hungaame bhi
Raat Ki guud mai muh dhaanp ke soo jaate thai
Narm rau waqt ke dhaare pe saffeen thi ravaan
Saahil-o-bahar ke aa-inn na badalte thai kabhi
Naa khudahoo pe bharoosa tha , muqadder pe Yakin
Chaadar-e-aab se toofaan na ubalte thai kahin
Hum ke toofaano ke paaley bhi sataye hai kabhi
Barq o bara mai woh hi shamey jalaye kaise
Yeh jo aatish-kadaa duniyaa mai bhadak uthaa hai
aansoon se har baar bhujaaye kaise

hmmm abhi aur baaki hai..

THe AwAkENing

The Awakening

A time comes in your life when you finally get it... When in the midst of all your fears and insanity you stop dead in your tracks and somewhere, the voice inside your head cries out - ENOUGH!

Enough fighting and crying, or struggling to hold on. And, like a child quieting down after a blind tantrum, your sobs begin to subside, you shudder once or twice, you blink back your tears and through a mantle of wet lashes, you begin to look at the world through new eyes.

This is your awakening...

You realize that it's time to stop hoping and waiting for something to change, or for happiness, safety and security to come galloping over the next horizon. You come to terms with the fact that he is not Prince Charming and you are not Cinderella and that in the real world, there aren't always fairy tale endings (or beginnings for that matter) and that any guarantee of "happily ever after" must begin with you and in the process, a sense of serenity is born of acceptance.

You awaken to the fact that you are not perfect and that not everyone will always love, appreciate or approve of who or what you are ... and that's OK. (They are entitled to their own views and opinions.) And you learn the importance of loving and championing yourself and in the process, a sense of new found confidence is born of self-approval.

You stop complaining and blaming other people for the things they did to you (or didn't do for you) and you learn that the only thing you can really count on is the unexpected. You learn that people don't always say what they mean or mean what they say and that not everyone will always be there for you and that it's not always about you. So, you learn to stand on your own and to take care of yourself and in the process, a sense of safety & security is born of self-reliance.

You stop judging and pointing fingers and you begin to accept people as they are and to overlook their shortcomings and human frailties and in the process, a sense of peace & contentment is born of forgiveness.

You realize that much of the way you view yourself and the world around you, is a result of all the messages and opinions that have been ingrained into your psyche. You begin to sift through all the junk you've been fed about how you should behave, how you should look and how much you should weigh, what you should wear and where you should shop and what you should drive, how and where you should live and what you should do for a living, who you should marry and what you should expect of a marriage, the importance of having and raising children or what you owe your parents. You learn to open up to new worlds and different points of view. You begin reassessing and redefining who you are and what you really stand for.

You learn the difference between wanting and needing and you begin to discard the doctrines and values you've outgrown, or should never have bought into to begin with and in the process, you learn to go with your instincts.

You learn that it is truly in giving that we receive and that there is power and glory in creating and contributing and you stop maneuvering through life merely as a "consumer" looking for your next fix.

You learn that principles such as honesty and integrity are not the outdated ideals of a by gone era, but the mortar that holds together the foundation upon which you must build a life.

You learn that you don't know everything; it's not your job to save the world and that you can't teach a pig to sing. You learn to distinguish between guilt and responsibility and the importance of setting boundaries and learning to say NO. You learn that the only cross to bear is the one you choose to carry and that martyrs get burned at the stake.

Then you learn about love. Romantic love and familial love. How to love, how much to give in love, when to stop giving and when to walk away. You learn not to project your needs or your feelings onto a relationship. You learn that you will not be more beautiful, more intelligent, more lovable or important because of the man on your arm or the child that bears your name.

You learn to look at relationships as they really are and not as you would have them be. You stop trying to control people, situations and outcomes.

You learn that just as people grow and change, so it is with love; and you learn that you don't have the right to demand love on your terms, just to make you happy.

You learn that alone does not mean lonely. You look in the mirror and come to terms with the fact that you will never be a size 5 or a perfect 10 and you stop trying to compete with the image inside your head and agonizing over how you "stack up."

You also stop working so hard at putting your feelings aside, smoothing things over and ignoring your needs. You learn that feelings of entitlement are perfectly OK and that it is your right, to want things and to ask for the things that you want and that sometimes it is necessary to make demands.

You come to the realization that you deserve to be treated with love, kindness, sensitivity and respect and you won't settle for less. You allow only the hands of a lover who cherishes you, to glorify you with his touch and in the process, you internalize the meaning of self-respect.

And you learn that your body really is your temple. And you begin to care for it and treat it with respect. You begin eating a balanced diet, drinking more water and taking more time to exercise. You learn that fatigue diminishes the spirit and can create doubt and fear. So you take more time to rest. Just as food fuels the body, laughter fuels our soul; so you take more time to laugh and to play.

You learn that for the most part in life, you get what you believe you deserve and that much of life truly is a self-fulfilling prophecy.

You learn that anything worth achieving is worth working for and that wishing for something to happen, is different from working toward making it happen.

More importantly, you learn that in order to achieve success you need direction, discipline and perseverance. You also learn that no one can do it all alone and that it's OK to risk asking for help.

You learn that the only thing you must truly fear is the great robber baron of all time; FEAR itself. You learn to step right into and through your fears, because you know that whatever happens you can handle it and to give in to fear, is to give away the right to live life on your terms.

You learn to fight for your life and not to squander it living under a cloud of impending doom. You learn that life isn't always fair, you don't always get what you think you deserve and that sometimes bad things happen to unsuspecting, good people. On these occasions, you learn not to personalize things. You learn that God isn't punishing you or failing to answer your prayers; it's just life happening.

You learn to deal with evil in its most primal state; the ego. You learn that negative feelings such as anger, envy and resentment must be understood and redirected or they will suffocate the life out of you and poison the universe that surrounds you. You learn to admit when you are wrong and to build bridges instead of walls.

You learn to be thankful and to take comfort in many of the simple things we take for granted; things that millions of people upon the earth can only dream about; a full refrigerator, clean running water, a soft warm bed, a long hot shower. Slowly, you begin to take responsibility for yourself, by yourself and you make yourself a promise to never betray yourself and to never ever settle for less than your heart's desire. You hang a wind chime outside your window so you can listen to the wind, and you make it a point to keep smiling, to keep trusting and to stay open to every wonderful possibility.

Finally, with courage in your heart and with God by your side you take a stand, you take a deep breath and you begin to design the life you want to live as best as you can.

This onez by virginia swift..


With a string in my hand
and an opportunity to fly
with a lead in my band
and no chance to shy
dont care,what i say
dont mind,what i do
just see my body sway
'n rockinn spirit in my shoe
guitar is in my hands now
so its a time to say wow
with a powerstand on the stage
'n with a passion in the guage let me rock the world
let me shock the world my wordz do havoc in the run
my handz do rock in the sun
i create a fighting boo in mindz
cuz i know how to make some rhymes lets do crush in the world
by your lips,sayin these wordz

something interestin by sneha..

DePriVed Of LovE

She was smiling right in front of me,
And I could not move my eyes off her…
She must surely be an angel, I had thought,
Or maybe it was another of my dreams…

In the distance I could hear laughter,
Everything was so unclear and hazy…
Maybe it was the coke that I cracked,
Sometimes I am desperate to forget…

I wept, silently, so that no-one heard,
Then I wiped her memories off my cheeks…
The fragrance was typical of its kind,
Maybe it was the smoke from the cigar…

Life is difficult to understand sometimes,
Nevertheless I am alive and breathing…
The dream which was once a reality,
Still runs through my imaginations…

I am not insane, neither am I a lunatic,
I am just another man deprived of love…

i m da rider of da storm

** StIll**

Still flow still waters
In seasoned streams
through ravaged deserts
to un-seen disappearances;
Like trapped water
no way , no cracks
no secret clues......
Unaffected, yet changed
Still water stays;
Visual seasons
Still, changing leaves
drink on-
on this storage wine;
Thorns guard peripheries
Holding movement to Still
Grazed, green moss of
untold days, unscraped Still;
A flowing path to hell's doors
Opens, from all sides
unmoving liquid is moulded
Into a raped angel's grave.

i love da way shez used da word still n da whole thing is like soo wonderfully written .. love it not mine .. bt i felt itz worth sharin ..

I StiLL woNDer WHy

Laying at night feeling lonely and empty
Will u ever just think about me?
Will you ever regret u had lost me?
Will u ever be able to see?

Will a single true tear drop
Ever be falling down from your eyes?
Will u ever remind me
Looking up at the shining sad stars?

Will u ever be sighing so heavy
When u hear our favorite songs?
Will u finally burst out crying,
Realizing there’s no me beside you..
Realizing there’s no one to hold?

Will u whisper my name in the silence
When your friends cannot hear what u say?
Will u ever feel wanting to find me
To get back, to embrace and to stay?

But I know there’s only one person
Who will cry and feel tortured of break
Who will hope… with no possible hope
Who would like to let go and forget.

Who wakes up at cold midnights
With an image of face in the mind.
Who is watching the moon in the black sky
Thinking about u and wanting to hide.

I’m the one, who will always remember,
Who’ll regret and feel guilty and blue
I’m the one saying “love u and hate u”
I’m the one feeling bad without u…..

an inspiration thank u ..


She'll let you in her house
If you come knockin' late at night
She'll let you in her life
If the words you say are right
If you pay the price
She'll let you deep inside
But there's a secret garden she hides

She'll let you in her car
To go drivin' round
She'll let you into the parts of herself
That'll bring you down
She'll let you in her heart if you got a hammer and a vise
But into her secret garden, don't think twice

You've gone a million miles
How far'd you get
To that place where you can't remember
And you can't forget
She'll lead you down a path
There'll be tenderness in the air
She'll let you come just far enough
So you know she's really there

She'll look at you and smile
And her eyes will say
She's got a secret garden
Where everything you want
Where everything you need
Will always stay
A million miles away

ItZ sOO tRU i Was alwayz A miLLiON mILez AWAY fRM hEr SEcret gARdEN haHa .. GOd savE ma sOUl

tHE SILenCe OF thE NighT

Tonight let’s spend some time together, you and I.
It seems it was aeons ago that we giggled merrily;
Finding heavenly bliss in each other’s company.
But this night is special in ways more than one;
For I have found the courage to talk to you again.

Often in lonely hours I look back at those treasures,
Which now seem lost like strangers in alien lanes.
I smile when reminded of the twinkle in your eyes;
Which seemed so innocent on those moonlit nights,
When Apollo weaved silvery robes for the dancing leaves.

But now there is nothing but silence between us;
Neither you, nor I try to bridge this divide.
Where our eyes could talk in silent conversations,
Even words have lost their meaning in this void.
So tonight let’s spend some time together, you and I.

I stare blankly into the icy cold of your eyes;
In search of warmth that had once seemed infinite.
Misunderstandings have wedged us miles apart;
None should blame the other, for we never tried.
Tonight leave the words aside, let silence do the talking.
So tonight let’s spend some time together, you and I.

da nItE tHAT i CANt ForGET

The Beast InSidE ( FrM sm 1- 2 me)

Lurking at the edges of my mind, the familiar dark ethereal form.
Burning through my veins in the silent midnight, a sleek liquid storm.

With eyes narrowed I sound a deafening yowl.
The primal catalyst which restores the natural hum of the night.

Claws flexed and sharpened, big teeth white and chalky.
Ready to feast on a local neighbourhood Yorkie.

Surveying from above with eyes akin to the luminious moon.
Listening to all the toms eagerly strain and croon.

Clear,Crisp footsteps resound in the cold moon-lit street.

Observing the frailty of the human mortality, the hunt begins once more.

Driven by the insensate pounding of the drum by the ancient mistress on her ebony black throne.

Ripped weak flesh and arterial spray to sate the eternal hunger, cursed by the cold cruel crone.

Twin brown eyes, half-hidden under the bridge, driven back into the shadows by the slow creeping dawn.

Twin brown eyes, waiting for the city to sleep again, then to devour flesh torn and blood frothy warm.

some one wrote this for me n i just love it hehe think they just got me.. wen i first read what she had sent n it was like omg .. seriously itz beautifull..may

WithouT u

Without You,
The bright sunshine during the day,
Seems dull and grey.
The warmth and the love therein,
The clouds of seperation take away.

Without You,
Dusk seems so lonely,
Defeated myself when i observe,
Lost in the halo of you.

Without You,
Nights at the window i sit picturing you,
The dew on my aspect and the twilight reflecting,
A mirage i see in my eyes, of you,
You not there, leaving me without you.

The little Voices in my head...

The little Voices in my head...

I listen to the lil voices in my head
which say ,you wont go much ahead
then another thought flashes by
as the saying on my wall catches my eye
Those who think they will fail have failed
And there i go , squashing the lil voices in my head
They creep, they crawl and at my deepest fears they gnaw
keeping me at a vulnerable cross road , self doubt ,mistrust
in my mind they load ,oh please, someone squash these voices in my head.
They call it self control, then why do these tears roll as relations take its toll.
I grovel in the sands of time , craving for the reassurance that she's only mine
Some one please sqaush these voices in my head.

ppl think they knw me ... bt i think i dunno my self then how do they knw me.. da lil voice keep me thinkin who i am n wat i want just anotha thing outta diz trash brain



I wonder how life could be so kind on me,
To shower me with all its fragrance,
And immerse me, within joy abound,
That for a lifetime is plentiful benevolence.

I may have done someday,
Magnanimous deeds of kindness,
That I happen to have lived this way,
In generous love and fondness

So much love and so much care,
I thought would lead me there.
The tender words mothered my soul,
My life I would stake, I swear.

The cajoling touch, the balmy smile,
In my heart, I gathered them there.
The sparkle of the eyes, I kept in wrap,
My nights would no longer stare.

But alas!! Truth prevails,
And I am awakened from deep slumber.
The dream I lived with in my sleep,
Is history that I may now remember?

Before my very eyes,
I see my dream stumble.
And being battered to an appalling end,
Where I can see it pitilessly crumble.

What error would I commit, only if I dreamt a bit
I am all but a human, who keeps desires within.
But fate has it unruly,
Dislodging me, from the place I mistook in my dream, My Home
Restoring the torment I’ve lived with,
And which I shall live with here on, all alone

it was just a dream i cant write this hehe itz just too good ..frm my secret friend for all ma friendz

Dont wanna Go but Cant really Stay..

Dont wanna Go but Cant really Stay..

Hold on to me,
Don’t let me go
But I would love to die in your arms,
Coz I love you so..

Your touch,
Brings me a glow
Just a thought of going apart,
And my heart drops low..

My heart is still beating,
Coz I can see you smile
Stay here,
Before I go, wanna see you for a while..

I don’t fear death anymore,
Coz I am here in your arms
Your twinkling eyes,
Still holds the magic that charms..

Don’t really wanna leave you and go,
But I can’t help it,
Its destined and I just cant stay anymore..

bt i just cant stay.. i dunno why .. what do u say..wud also lyk to mention few ppl helped me wid diz so kudoz to em tooo